Family Kes

The question: How are you? seems innocent, but for someone who is overstressed or has a burnout, that’s a far too big question.

How’s what?

How is everything going? That cannot be answered. That’s 1001 questions in one. Normally someone would answer that question with ease. ‘Good’ we answer. Now this cannot be answered, because there are things that go well, there are things that go reasonably well, but there are also things that go downright badly.

I can feel calm in my body at the moment, but at the same time have a pounding headache from lack of sleep. If you ask this question while I’m relaxing on the couch with a book, I could answer ‘right’. But if you ask him half an hour later because I have to think about what we’re going to have for dinner, the answer might be a completely different one. I can answer this question differently at any time of the day, while I am stressed.

Better questions would be:

• How are you feeling right now?
• Did you sleep well?
• Do you feel rested?
• Do you feel calm inside?
• Are you going outside today?
• Are you talking to someone?
• What things can you not do yet?
• What things can you do again?
• Do you regularly have headaches?
• Can you eat well?
• Are you still experiencing heart palpitations?
• What bothers you most at the moment?
• What do you need right now?

What do you need right now?

I ask myself this question all day long. Every time I come to the conclusion that I don’t want to do anything again for a while. Working is nice for a few hours, but then I really need some rest. So don’t continue with the dishwasher, washing machine, etc. Just do nothing for an hour. Afterwards I prefer to go for a walk or cycle, so that I can get some exercise and get outside at all. And then do nothing for another hour. Just like I’m a baby. Wake up, sleep, wake up, sleep. I am now constantly on, off, on, off during the day.

What I can’t do now that I’m stressed out

I have written a number of blogs about how I experience things now that I’m stressed out. Hopefully there won’t be many more and I will get rid of this condition soon.

• Overstressed driving the car
• Overstressed going to the supermarket
• Overstressed sleeping
• Overstressed cooking
• The question: How are you?